reprinted from December 2004
Now given that we are home-schoolers, and Christians, AND a bit odd… And given that I am very opinionated and have no hesitation about sharing my opinions, it’s no surprise that almost every December someone asks me how we handle Santa Claus.
My family “did” Santa when I was little. I thought Santa was real until the advanced age of five when my older brother took it upon himself to enlighten me. I don’t remember being particularly upset - as long as we still got the presents, what was the problem? The Santa thing was fun - and I really loved the resulting tradition that there were only a few presents under the tree before Christmas, but come Christmas morning… Foom! It was like a mystical, magical present explosion had happened under the tree. Oh how I loved coming down EARLY Christmas morning, still bleary eyed, peering at the pile of presents by the light of the tree. (I still love that, actually, but now I have to have a mug of coffee in my hand to enhance the experience.)
I mention all this to show that I have no childhood hostilities or trauma about Santa underlying the decision we have made to NOT do Santa.
Why don’t we do Santa? Well, the first reason is the whole “not lying to the kids” thing. I just had this mental image of a young man standing before me and saying “Okay, so Santa was a lie, the Easter Bunny another lie, Tooth Fairy - lie again… and you want me to believe you about Jesus?!” Maybe it wouldn’t happen - but maybe it would… Why take the chance?
The second reason came from something that happened when my oldest was just a little shaver - probably about to turn 3. We were at the Exchange (Military department store) and a Santa was sitting in the toy department. Daniel eyed him curiously, and the gentleman offered him a candy cane if he would come on up and sit on his lap and all that Santa jazz. (funny, any other time of year when a man offers your kid candy and says come sit on my lap this is a BAD thing) I told Daniel he could go if he wanted to, but explained to the man that Daniel didn’t know who Santa was. From the horrified stare on Santa’s face, you would have thought I said we ate Rudolph on skewers for lunch. Daniel sat down and the Santa started his spiel, “So what do you want for Christmas?” Daniel didn’t answer, he had never been asked this question before. The man prompted him “Would you like a fire truck? A train?” Well those things sounded pretty good, so Daniel nodded his head. “You just tell Santa what you want and I’ll make sure you get it”. This was the point where Mommy got mad. I didn’t do anything, or say anything, but I wish I had. What went through my head was “When will Santa be handing over his Visa?” How dare he make a promise like that to a child, MY child? That’s when I realized some things about this Santa deal.
First of all, as I said, my son had never heard the question “What do you want for Christmas?” and to this day - he still hasn’t heard it from his parents. I am with him every day. I know what he likes. And I know what I want him to have. I don’t need to encourage his normal human greed by having him make a list or write a letter to Santa. Those traditions, though cute, don’t keep the focus on the true meaning of Christmas. This year is the first time Daniel has even talked about his forthcoming gifts. With a cute little smile he says “I wonder what I’m getting for Christmas!” and I say back “I wonder what you’re giving!” And he grins and says “Oh! I need to make a list!”, sits down and starts writing a very grandiose list of the gifts he wants to give to family and friends. His gift ideas are much more than he can afford, but I like his list.
And second, I don’t want my kids looking to a mythical figure for the fulfillment of their dreams, nor do I want them feeling grateful to him. My mom told me that my dad never liked putting “from Santa” on the presents- he didn’t want Santa getting any of the credit. Well Amen to that! I don’t either. My kids should be grateful to their parents, other gift-givers, and ultimately to God for the blessings that come their way this Christmas.
Lest I sound grinchy… My kids do know who Santa is. We watch Rudolph, we watch Santa Claus Is Coming To Town. We have a cute story book called Santa are you for Real? which sweetly explains how Santa is based on Saint Nicholas who gave to others because of his love for Christ. I’ve taught them that Santa is a game people play and that it is not their job to tell other kids that he isn’t real. (I’ve no desire to field phone calls from angry parents!) Santa is just not the main part of their Christmas, he’s more of an aside. After all, what with Christmas music, Christmas goodies, Christmas crafts, Christmas parties, Christmas decorating, and our own family Christmas traditions we really don’t have time to miss the big guy. My kids have lots of fun at Christmas with all the magic, all the wonder, that being a child at Christmas should bring. They just get it from rejoicing in the miracle of Christ’s birth instead of some dapper dude in a reindeer-powered sleigh.
